Build Your Own Secret Tel Aviv Post!
Hi Secret Tel Aviv! I want to
Buy
lease
exchange
swap
cook
Surf
Sell
Stalk
Eat
Order
Learn
Clean
Date
Smuggle through Ben Gurion
Marry
Move
Hire
Complain about
Model
film
Identify
ask out
fix
Sublet
Donate
return
Rent
work for
vent about
steal
Sleep With
film
The balloon above the yarkon
used cosmetics
An escaped ostrich in Jerusalem
The guy who lies in the Dizangoff Square Fountain
a sweater for my pet chicken
The mold in my shower
a computer from the '90's
The Street Person On Allenby By King George with Face Tats and Sequined Skinny Jeans
the Tachanah Merkezit
Israeli men
my ex girlfriend
My apartment
several cats that live behind the AM/PM
a tarantula in my kitchen
the Danish girl who posted a video on Secret Tel Aviv about apartment hunting
a broken Iphone 4
A Lone Soldier
Holmes Gym
a bikini I bought online
"Keeping Olim in Israel"
the lifeguard on Gordon beach
a half a bottle of Arak
Matisyahu tickets
Swedish girls on holiday
cupcakes
medical marijuana
The owner of the men's underwear that I found in my laundry
my local juice vendor
the shuk
your mom
a used pair of Uggs
FOREX options
twin sisters looking for an apartment
but the problem is
Secret Secret Secret Tel Aviv said some hurtful things about my cat
Yaffo is really far
I lost my Rav Kav
My Vaad Bayit hates me
Jonny won't give me a Secret Tel Aviv card
(Random complaint about the French)
Your roommates are idiots
The seats on the green bikes make my butt hurt
Nefesh B'Nefesh keeps sexting me
somebody on Secret Tel Aviv called me a racist
our dogs don't get along
I can't get the tahini out of my chest hair
My pet rabbit ran away
Hot Cable Froze my Bank Account
I'm allergic to hummus
The buses stop running Friday afternoon
The Misrad HaPnim only accepts faxes
Cofix asked me to leave
My boyfriend keeps asking me to dress up like a Sem Girl
Biggie Z's makes me claustrophobic
Dizzy Frisch says that I "made a scene"
My Girlfriend's Therapist says that I'm "An Enabler"
The Norwegian exchange student filed a restraining order
Secret Tel Aviv keeps blocking me
Can somebody help me
Fix my Dud Shemesh
jailbreak my IPhone
break up with my boyfriend over Skype
Sneak across the border to Aqaba
Locate a rave dance party that offers babysitting
hit on your neighbor
steal my bike back
Find a Masorti Shul
Escape from My Birthright Tour
translate something into Spanish
Move to Florentin
grow a hipster beard
tell me where the Shuk is
Sue my landlord
tell me the bus schedule for tomorrow
Find a Yoga Class
Get a job in Binary
convert to Judaism
Quit Bezeq
grow a Jewfro
build a new dog park near the Shuk
get free Internet
Sell your futon
Find a sweater for a pet chicken
Hide my bank account
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend