Build Your Own Secret Tel Aviv Post!
Hi Secret Tel Aviv! I want to
Sleep With
film
fix
Sublet
exchange
Complain about
Order
steal
Identify
Model
cook
Buy
Surf
Move
Donate
Rent
lease
work for
ask out
vent about
Clean
Hire
Marry
Smuggle through Ben Gurion
Eat
swap
Stalk
return
Sell
Date
film
Learn
Holmes Gym
the lifeguard on Gordon beach
the Danish girl who posted a video on Secret Tel Aviv about apartment hunting
My apartment
your mom
my local juice vendor
medical marijuana
"Keeping Olim in Israel"
a bikini I bought online
a sweater for my pet chicken
a computer from the '90's
A Lone Soldier
the shuk
FOREX options
The Street Person On Allenby By King George with Face Tats and Sequined Skinny Jeans
The owner of the men's underwear that I found in my laundry
The mold in my shower
a half a bottle of Arak
The balloon above the yarkon
the Tachanah Merkezit
An escaped ostrich in Jerusalem
a tarantula in my kitchen
cupcakes
several cats that live behind the AM/PM
a used pair of Uggs
Swedish girls on holiday
a broken Iphone 4
Matisyahu tickets
The guy who lies in the Dizangoff Square Fountain
used cosmetics
my ex girlfriend
twin sisters looking for an apartment
Israeli men
but the problem is
My Girlfriend's Therapist says that I'm "An Enabler"
The buses stop running Friday afternoon
Nefesh B'Nefesh keeps sexting me
I lost my Rav Kav
I can't get the tahini out of my chest hair
Yaffo is really far
Your roommates are idiots
Hot Cable Froze my Bank Account
somebody on Secret Tel Aviv called me a racist
(Random complaint about the French)
Secret Tel Aviv keeps blocking me
The seats on the green bikes make my butt hurt
Secret Secret Secret Tel Aviv said some hurtful things about my cat
Biggie Z's makes me claustrophobic
Cofix asked me to leave
our dogs don't get along
I'm allergic to hummus
The Misrad HaPnim only accepts faxes
My Vaad Bayit hates me
My pet rabbit ran away
Dizzy Frisch says that I "made a scene"
My boyfriend keeps asking me to dress up like a Sem Girl
Jonny won't give me a Secret Tel Aviv card
The Norwegian exchange student filed a restraining order
Can somebody help me
Fix my Dud Shemesh
jailbreak my IPhone
convert to Judaism
Sneak across the border to Aqaba
Locate a rave dance party that offers babysitting
build a new dog park near the Shuk
steal my bike back
Find a Yoga Class
tell me where the Shuk is
Find a sweater for a pet chicken
get free Internet
grow a hipster beard
Sue my landlord
Escape from My Birthright Tour
translate something into Spanish
hit on your neighbor
Sell your futon
break up with my boyfriend over Skype
Move to Florentin
tell me the bus schedule for tomorrow
Quit Bezeq
Find a Masorti Shul
grow a Jewfro
Hide my bank account
Get a job in Binary
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend
Asking for a friend